The Secret of Easier Parenting is Lightening Up.
May 7th, 2008 by Caroline
My experience is that Confrontation with your Middle School teen does not make your life easier. The question is why do so many parents, myself included, fall into that destructive form of talking so frequently?
Is Anybody Listening out there?
I find that my temper can begin to boil in just a few seconds, when dealing with my teenager. But wait! Does that mean that I am a hot head and have to work on my own anger management? Absolutely not! It means that I have come to the last stage of the weekly weary process of trying to help structure my son’s time through negotiation so that it is wisely divided up between work and play. After all, I want a responsible boy as an active member of this family.
Distractions, Distractions and More Distractions.
The truth is that I can’t really get his attention for an undisturbed length of time so that he can focus on the discussion. First there is the computer game to switch off, then there is the I-pod to remove from the ear, then there is his side unfocussed look which is checking out the contents of the fridge, and did I mention the sound of the TV from his twin brother in the other room?
Frustration
I had imagined parenting to be easier than this. The most dramatic option available as a Mom is to explode. Surely that will get his attention? Ranting and raving with a long lecture is a great release for me so maybe there is some benefit for the family. I get to express my opinion and it is heard loud and clear. I finally have his attention. Do you get my drift?
Lighten Up Lady.
Then I remember good parenting advice I had enjoyed recently from a video clip that I wanted to share with you. By lightening up with your teenager, you will have a far profounder effect on your teen and will even be an excellent role model. Exploding really is the last resort and a pretty damaging one too. However, humor can hit the spot and get your point over far more effectively, and hey, I got his attention when we watched this clip together
Helpful suggestion
This is just one of the 52 helpful resources that made my Parenting Easier and I strongly recommend that you give it a try.
http://www.easierparentingmiddleschool.com/ar/item1pn.html
